ROANOKE RAPIDS — Protecting yourself and helping others is what took pen to paper for Roanoke Rapids Mayor Emery Doughtie recently when he recognized February 2010 as “Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month” in the city.

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The proclamation does not come as part of any planned activities, but was issued in response to a letter from Robert Alan Silverstein of StopDatingViolence.org. Silverstein’s daughter Emily was murdered at college 10 months ago by her ex-boyfriend, which led Silverstein to launch the Web site. So far, the site is dedicated to raising awareness at local and national levels and they have sent dating pledge cards to all 50 states. The cards carry promises of non-abuse as pledges for dating couples to make to each other.

Mayor Doughtie’s proclamation asserts one in three young people are affected by physical, sexual or verbal dating violence and one in five have reported being slapped, pushed, hit, threatened or coerced by a partner. Later, the proclamation states young people can choose better relationships once they understand respect serves as a foundation of healthy relationships and once they are aware of warning signs of abuse.

“Elimination of dating violence must be achieved through cooperation of individuals, organizations and communities,” the proclamation reads. “Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month provides an excellent opportunity for citizens to learn more about preventing dating violence and to show support for the numerous organizations and individuals who provide critical advocacy, services and assistance to victims.”

The proclamation concludes with Doughtie officially designating February 2010 as Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month in the city of Roanoke Rapids.

“I do believe this is a serious problem across America,” Doughtie said. “With the communication gap being so great among many young people and the adults that are responsible for them the problem is difficult to control.”

Doughtie also cited peer pressure as a cause of young people perhaps staying in potentially violent dating relationships. “A great amount of pressure is put on young (people) to be accepted in their peer groups,” Doughtie stated, “many times this forces them to do things they know are unsafe and just plain wrong.”

The mayor feels it’s up to adults to make it clear to kids of dating age to watch after their own safety. “I would want to emphasize the importance of being aware of the environment that they allow themselves to become involved,” Doughtie said. “Look for signs of bad behavior and substance abuse.”

Doughtie also stresses the importance of involving others to prevent potential problems or when problems arise. “Try to make your activities include others that you can trust to come to your aid should things go wrong,” Doughtie advised. “If you do not have an adult that you can confide in, seek out someone through a trusted organization that offers help to individuals experiencing this type of problem.”